Monday 2 April 2007

Ramblings

Its strange when people ask how i feel i say I'm fine but when i think about things i wonder has it really sunk in about Dad. I'm so use to living away from home and not see them all the time that i wonder if it hasn't really hit home that dads not there any more. I know they have been close the last few months and that's been great and especially now I'm so glad moms close. I really not sure how or what i feel, there are times when i don't want to be the brave one the grown up any more i want to be my dads little girl. Its hard to think i wont ever be daddys little girl anymore. And that's usually when Ste is there helping me.

Its difficult to say some words without the other and i am always finding myself saying mom and dad those names just seem to be together. Last night as we sat sorting out the Easter cards i gave Ste his mom and dads to write on and he said should he put an R on it so we knew which mom and dad it was for (Something we have always Done) And then was mortified when he realised what he said. But i now exactly where he coming from. At times it seems so unreal that dad has gone and other times all to real.

But i do now that everything happens for a reason and there is a time for everything. And i thank God for what i have. Because i know as bad have things have been that without Ste and Abi but especially Ste they would have been unbearable. It just shows how ammazing God is and how he provides for us because the things that have happened this last few months have made such a difference with losing Dad and it is perfectly clear there all Gods plan for our lives. Sorry to use a really cheesy cliche but you know the song in Sound of music where the captain and Marie finally admit there feelings for each others they say (i must have done something right in my youth or childhood cause here you are standing ) Well not sure what i have done to deserve Ste cause i couldn't have anyone better by my side to share my life with and he was certainly worth the wait. I know just how fortunate i am to have him even though at times he drives me mad. I know that we are meant to be together and there is no one else i would rather be with and as Dad said just before our Wedding Anniversary i have never seen to people more made for each other. I have found my Aaron.

3 comments:

screammi99 said...

I miss dad too.
But remember it's not only steve and abi you have, you have mum and you've always got me too.
Now to have me has to be a really good deal doesn't it?

Cheeky Ste said...

I know you do pete and i know i have got you and mom as well, not sureabout the deal though cause you get ste Abi and macy with me know that got be worth something

smiler said...

Lorna that's took an awful lot of courage, you know you have always got so many people around things don't sink in all the time as quick as you think or wish. Your dad may have gone in persn but he is always in your heart, he will be watching you in heaven keeping your seat warm and thinking i do wish Lorna would do what she's asked, how great is it that she's not just on chips any more, and hasn't abi got big.

you and your mom and pete are probably closer than ever maybe this is something which has happened to remind each other that you are always there just like you said God does things for a reason.

big cuddles

love auntie rach